Note: This week's Ask RAMBO comes to us from Ryan Smith. Thanks, Ryan!
Agnostic in Alabama asks: RAMBO, I was raised in a pretty conservative religious household, and the church has always been a big part of my life. Well, in the last couple of years I've really started to reevaluate my belief system, and I've realized there are a lot of things about organized religion that I just can't buy into any longer. In fact, I think it's fair to say at this point that I've lost my faith. However, I know that my deconversion would shatter my very devout parents. Should I be honest with them about my doubts, or hold my tongue out of deference to their peace of mind?
Thanks for the question, Agnostic. As I slid my knife into the guard's belly, yanking upward and spilling his intestines as if I were dressing out a buck, I realized he wasn't much more than a child. A child with hopes, dreams, fears. A child with his first kiss, his first heartbreak, and so much more still ahead of him. A child who was dying now, all those dreams fading in the filthy pile of his own spilled entrails, just as the light was fading from his eyes. I thought I saw a brief flash of comprehension in those eyes, the realization of all that I was robbing from him, just before the darkness swallowed him in its cold and loveless embrace. Then he was gone. God wasn't there that day, my friend. Only me and that boy. I see his face some nights when I try to sleep. When the demons come. And deep down, I know he's the lucky one. Oblivion may be uncaring, but there are no nightmares there.
Boy, parents can be tough to talk to, can't they? :)